12 lessons we've learned in 12 years

Last weekend my husband and I celebrated 12 years of marriage!

Seriously, how do 12 years go by that fast?!

We've certainly had many great times and our fair share of hard times too but, it's so worth it!

We've both grown a lot so, I thought it would be fun to see what some of the lessons are that we've both learned along the way. Without telling each other our answers, I wrote down six lessons that I've learned throughout our marriage and, Aaron wrote down six lessons...

Here are 12 lessons we've learned in the last 12 years of marriage:


1. Communication is Key

  • Talk about all the things, even when it's hard to do.

2. Learn & embrace each other's love language

  • Game Changer! Learn & Speak each other's love language. This is a huge help, especially if you have different love languages like we do.

3. Don't take yourself too seriously

  • Let go of the little things. Learn to laugh along the way.

4. Always try to put the other before yourself (this goes both ways)

  • When both people are full in, putting each other before themselves, marriage becomes pretty darn amazing! You loved this person enough to marry them.. show them!

5. Pray & Have Faith

  • Prayer and Faith goes a long way in life and marriage.

6. Grow through life together

  • hear too often couples say that they just grew apart. Everyone changes over time, but that doesn't mean y'all have to grow in separate directions. Grow together, hand in hand. Life is much better when you go through it together.


1. Time is precious and short

  • Make the intentional choice to spend time with those you love. Life goes by so fast that if you don’t stop to enjoy what is around you, then you will miss it.

2. Talking helps with everything

  • Talking about anything and everything only helps to bring a husband and wife closer together.

3. You’re on the same team, so operate out of the same book.

  • This is where talking about everything helps. You can’t be a team if you are on different pages of what should be done or how to do it.

4. Listen!!!! And Listen again!!!

  • Although talking about everything is important, it does no good if you do not listen as well. I mean actual listening, not just hearing and then forgetting what was said, but actually hearing, thinking about, and they asking questions to clarify, type of listening.

5. Family is more important than yourself.

  • Even though it is very hard, it is better to give up what you want to do so that your spouse or loved ones can do what they want. This, in return, blesses you with the feeling that only true love and generosity can bring.

6. It’s the little things that matter most.

  • The little things in life, and in love, are the things that matter most and are the memories that are most treasured. These are the little details, simple acts of service, or sweet comments that light up someone’s day or just make them feel special.

Y’all, marriage isn't the fairy tale that books and movies make it out to be. It's hard work! It's two separate people, with different personalities, goals, and interests coming together to live one life together.

I'm not going to lie.... there will be hard times. There will be times where you wonder why you feel like you are both on separate pages, but when to remember that you both can have those differences and still go & grow through life together...

that's when marriage gets better than the fairy tales.